It's all fun and games until someone lays on a bed of bees: Holiday dangers that they didn't warn you about

 It occurred to me, as I watched my children scale a roof for optimal 4th of July parade viewing, that there is an element of danger to almost every holiday event. It occurs to me, Savannah interrupted, that surpassing the legal drinking age and living seven hours away should upgrade me from "child" to "adult." Bear with me though. Think about it. Thanksgiving is a clear risk between flailing carving knives and the latest trend in deep-fried turkey explosions. Although the Victorian-Era tradition of candled Christmas trees has evolved to a more flame-free version, there is still a possibility of Christmas plant poisoning. Although I would have to question the mental stability of the individual who deliberately ingests Mistletoe ...still, the risk remains. Easter seems relatively harmless. But a little research revealed just how dangerous this seemingly sweet holiday could be: 

• Do not hide eggs near an electrical outlet or plugs. 
• Do not hide eggs in light sockets
• Do not hide eggs in, on, under or around glass.
• Keep eggs at or below eye level of the children.  (You wouldn't want the little darlings to get a neck-ache...no unnecessary chiropractic bill for you!--parenthetical notation courtesy of Amy Mosiman--I deleted the rest of my snide observations to this bullet-ed list as they seemed crass and/or insensitive to the idiocy of others)
• Keep count and track of the eggs you hid.
•  (https://nationalsafetyinc.org/2013/03/29/easter-safety-tips-2/)                      

But the 4th of July is a given. Especially at my house. Last year was our unintentional re-enactment of The Hunger Games. This year's movie shout-out was Than's nuanced portrayal of New York City policeman, John McClane of the Die Hard franchise. There he was: Hunched nimbly among twenty-year-olds, flicking his Bic at a flimsy inch-and-a-half wick, Than remained calm and cool as fuses were lit with random precision around him. Ignoring the crowd screaming at him to run, Than held his flimsy lighter with steely resolve. Time stood still, a hush fell over the suddenly silent field, and then the wick took. Knees high like a marching band drum major, Than fled the fiery scene, silhouetted in a blinding halo of orange, yellow, and red as the area erupted.


And it wouldn't "bee" the 4th of July at the Mosimans if our little uninvited guests didn't make an appearance. Brad had repeatedly mowed a swath of field as a viewing area. As dusk dimmed to dark, my friend Amy unfurled a blanket and stretched out...sitting up in alarm to ask if were normal to have her blanket writhe about. Little did she know that she was laying on a bed of bees. It just heightened the excitement for a "bee-"-dazzling display. No matter the holiday, the Mosimans laugh in the face of danger. Then we scream and run away.