Not your typical "Norman Rockwell" Thanksgiving

Ahhhh...Thanksgiving. You've seen the Norman Rockwell depiction. I've given up any hope of ever achieving that level of nostalgic family togetherness. I have no one else to blame as we seem to be the common variable of dysfunction whether we are in New York or Iowa. While the majority of my fellow Americans were watching the Macy's Day parade, we spent an hour, buried in blankets, transfixed by a horrifying episode of "When Turkeys Attack."

Ensconced on the couch with his daughter and nieces, Uncle Virgil has been busy organizing that fun family game of "Let's compare...(toes, finger spans, bicep muscles and wrist veins). The occupants of the living room received a lengthy dissertation on the rare condition called "Greek toe" where one's second big toe is taller than the captain. When Virgil concluded his lecture on limbs and ligaments, he dramatically rose, causing the couch to rock forward, the girls screaming as their anchor exited his spot.

Awakening after what the hobbits fondly call "First Nap," I stretched and sleepily asked my husband if he could smell the amazing scent of Thanksgiving dinner as it wafted its way upstairs to our room. "I can't smell over the sound of my brother's voice," he mumbled into his pillow. We made our way down to the kitchen where we were assigned jobs according to our specific skill levels. Virgil was making gravy and mashing potatoes while Brad manned the carving stations. "You can be in charge of drinks," my mother-in-law, with gentle wisdom, told me as she wrestled an additional three tablespoons of butter past Virgil's flailing elbow.

Games commenced following dinner. The girls disappeared for what the hobbits fondly call "Second Nap" but were immediately roused by my indignant father-in-law, bent on forcing them to have family fun. Blatant cheating was the underlying theme of the day. It just makes one thankful that we have the ability to suspend our morals for this very special day. I believe that was the underlying theme of that Norman Rockwell painting.