The Ruling Stands: Amy- 1, Erin- 0

It was my extensive knowledge of the rules pertaining to baseball that essentially saved me. I was leading my line of loyal 4th graders down the hall from lunch when we reached "The Intersection." My kids innately know that, if my friend Erin is in the right-hand corridor with her troop of teeny-boppers, we immediately divert left. And there she was. Stealthily, on tip-toe, we tried to get past undetected. But Erin's "Amy-radar" is a fine-tuned mechanism. She called out to me...and like Lot's wife, I turned. My bubbly buddy blew me a kiss.

It was an automated response...I swear. Like swatting away a fly. Or scraping poo from your shoe. My hand lifted to my lips and my 4th graders gasped in horror while Erin lit up, ready to be on the receiving end of a loving gesture. "It doesn't count," I declared, dropping my hand dismissively, "the act of blowing a kiss is ruled incomplete. Checked." Erin stomped over and immediately began arguing against the ruling. I commiserated but assured her that there was no appeal for the checked blowing-a-kiss rule. Unable to admit defeat, Erin sought out council from a committee of our peers. Re-enactments were presented. Clarifying questions were addressed. It all seemed to hinge on one key inquiry: Were the lips...at any time...pursed? We reviewed the film. Everyone agreed that it was a tough call but, in the end, justice prevailed. "The ruling stands," came the unsurprising announcement, "as there was no evidence of pursed lips and there was no follow-through extension of the hand from the mouth outward, it is hereby determined that a kiss was not officially blown. I repeat. A kiss was not officially blown." Vindicated, my shoulders sagged in relief. Erin WAS NOT pleased. "I'll tell you what blows..." she muttered, "that call blows." Not one to throw in the towel, though, Erin turned to me and smiled. "Don't worry, Amy, I'll catch ya next time."