Sydney's wedding: I'll be there with bells on

 I was honored to be asked to give the prayer at Sydney and Douglas's wedding. Years ago, when my girls were still little, I developed the habit of praying for the future spouses of my daughters...asking God to watch over their health, their safety, their up-bringing. I prayed that these two, still-unknown-to-me, individuals were given ample opportunity to develop the attributes of kindness, patience, sacrifice, self-worth, honesty, fidelity, compassion, humility, hard-work, and, of course, forgiveness. I prayed for partners with whom my daughters would be, one day, equally yoked.

Lisa, as you know, arrived first. God had provided me with a third daughter and she is such a welcomed blessing to our family.

And then...along came Douglas.

Who treats Sydney like the princess she is...who wants nothing more than for Sydney to be precisely who she is...

Who was the only one who bothered to warn his future mother-in-law of an up-coming speed bump on our walk and was the only one horrified when she inevitably tripped over it and flopped over. And...was the only one to help her up because everyone else was laughing so hard.

Who cemented his place in my heart when he threw his unconditional and enthusiastic support behind the girls' ceaseless dog rescue efforts...over thirty homeless dogs successfully placed...and in one heartbreaking moment, Douglas retrieved a wayward furry friend, and carried her to her heavenly home. He showed strength and sensitivity in the wake of worry and then sorrow. Douglas is a man who can handle tough times with common sense and compassion.

So...the prayer.

Yeah.

I would have preferred to have been dressed more like the lady than the tramp but beggars can't be bimbos. 

I thought back to my own wedding...almost 40 years ago. One of the happiest days of my life. Transformative. Meaningful. And, I had so much fun. 

If I could change one thing, though...

I would have included God in a more deliberate, intentional way.

At 18, Brad and I had a fleeting, far-off relationship with the Lord.  We "hired" a pastor. We "booked" a church. So we were covered, right? 

I now realize that we had forgotten to invite the most important guest to our wedding and I didn't want to make that mistake again.

A careful balance would have to be struck. I wanted to do more than just provide thanks for the food. But I also didn't want Sydney and Douglas's friends and family to think they'd mistakenly wandered into a revival. I wanted to praise God without having people fear that I was about to start handling snakes. I wanted to be able to show how much I loved the Lord without also looking looney. To sound sincere without being sappy. To share and not separate. To include...not isolate. 

My family is quick to remind me that, occasionally, my enthusiasm can cause more harm than good. Years ago, the Mosimans were rocking along happily in a wagon train out west (We would be robbed by masked bandits soon after) when our guide led us in a rousing rendition of Amazing Grace. So caught up in this timeless moment, I shouted "Second verse," to keep the good times rolling. Unfortunately, no one else in our wagon knew the second verse and my own family left me hanging out to dry as I performed the second verse of what could only have been called Atrocious Grace.

What was I going to do? 

And then in struck me.

The bell.

I had been visiting the girls in San Diego and had been finally trusted with meeting some of their friends. This was a big deal.

We went to the very same winery where Sydney and Douglas would later have their wedding.

I valiantly fought to make a good impression. I tried so hard to appear like a normal person and not embarrass my daughters.

Until sensory over-load kicked in.

Needing some air (We were seated at an outdoor patio), I got up and wandered over to a large bell. The rope was a silken tassel. I began to braid and unbraid it...letting the mindless motion calm my anxious nerves. Realizing I was wearing a hair band, I pulled it out to attach it to my final braid...transforming the tassel into a woven rope. It was almost closing time. Besides my small party, there were very few people left on the patio. I sneaked a quick peek around and...

Yeah.

I did it. 

It was magnificent. I expected colonial school children to come running. I looked for the Cartwrights to come galloping up for supper. Where on earth was Quasimodo? The resounding peale of the bell signaled our departure. 

And...months later...inspired a prayer.

Ecclesiastes 4:12

A cord of three stands is not easily broken.

Shout out to my dear friend Jan Clark who, a lifetime ago, had had a marriage column based on that verse published in our church's Chapel Echoes for years. 

And then Sydney chimed in.

As I still wrestled with my internal turmoil about the direction and depth of my prayer, I overheard Sydney, the day before her wedding, recounting the story of my braiding the bell to one of her friends. 

My intent was now as clear as a bell.

I thanked all of Sydney and Douglas's guests for coming. ALL of them...thanking Jesus for his valued attendance...although, knowing His fondness of weddings and wine...I shouldn't have been surprised by His prompt RSVP.  I shared my gratitude for one of the most precious gifts in my life: Sydney Lynn and that the Lord would provide her with a partner of strong conviction, admirable moral character, and equally bland taste buds. Those two could subsist off of hot dogs and chicken nuggets for a lifetime. I thanked Douglas's parents for raising such an incredible young man.

And then I spoke of the bell.

One of my favorite moments was my last-minute, desperate search of the crowd as I named the
members of the party in attendance that evening. A movement in the back caught my eye and I spotted my sweet friend Rhoda. I blew her a kiss which she effortlessly caught, causing chuckles to ripple across the crowd and giving me courage. Later, Savannah would feign outrage that her friends inevitably become best friends with me (In Rhoda's case...this is absolutely true).

I did not speak eloquently but I did speak from the heart. Sydney and Douglas generously gave me an opportunity to speak of my faith and my love for Jesus. I may have missed my opportunity to include the Lord in my wedding but I am so grateful that I could be the one to extend our invitation for Him to attend my daughter's. 

I made sure to encourage our guests to see the bell for themselves before they left for the night. And...if no one was looking...to go ahead and give it a go...

Because we know for Whom the bell tolls...