I'm so OVER the moon

 I'm so tired of this game.

"Mom, wake up," Sydney whispered several early mornings ago, "Come look at the moon. It's unbelievably big."  I have accidentally earned an undeserved reputation for admiring the celestial goings-on of the sky over Hardys Road. More accurately, I just get peeved when my neighbor, Deb posts incredible pictures of sunsets/sunrises, ect which I look at appreciatively and wonder, When did that happen? Oh. Five minutes ago while I was watching Pitch Perfect II for the zillionth time?

So with a reluctant sigh, I crawled out of bed, fumbled with my robe, and shuffled slowly out the door. Like a middle-aged zombie, I stomped, stiff-legged through the lawn, my neck fused in an upwards position...searching...searching...for this incredibly big moon that I could lord over Deb. "Where is it," I shouted into the house (to the delight of my neighbors, I'm sure). "Over my car," Sydney bellowed back. What a delight to live next door to the Mosimans. She joined me moments later where I was standing, betrayed, by her car beneath an empty sky. "Well...it was there when I came out," she insisted, "you just took too long getting out here." "Moons are NOT meteorites, Sydney," I snarled before slinking back to bed, "They appear, more or less, in a fixed position as they move SLOWLY across the sky."

"Amy, wake up," Brad whispered the next morning, "Come look at the moon." This is ridiculous. Let Deb have her little victories, reveling in God's great outdoors while my mind turns to mush watching Me-TV. "Leave me alone, " I grumbled, burrowing deeper under my covers. "No, no...you're going to want to see this," my husband coaxed. So with a reluctant sigh, I crawled out of bed, fumbled with my robe, and shuffled slowly out the door. "Where is it," I shouted into the house. Brad, the only considerate Mosiman residing on Hardys, immediately came outside and pointed. "See where that giant patch of dark clouds have gathered," he said. "Yeah?" "Your moon is now hiding behind them. You took too long getting out here."

I headed back to bed, my mind whirling with the great questions of the universe. How does Deb do it? Does she have a trail cam that she uses in between re-runs of Andy Griffith? Does my utter lack of apathy regarding astronomy make me a bad person? And just how fast does the moon travel, anyway?